After passing through sufficient turbulence and disorientation, finding new coping strategies, and tapping into previously unknown sources of courage the individual goring through a transformative experience may feel a renewed sense of purpose and empowerment. This transition bears fresh opportunities to truly live a life aligned with one's authentic self.
I believe this movement through turbulence and disorientation may carry redemptive value when seen as a transformation of consciousness. James Hollis, whose work I refer to in my previous two blog posts on major life transitions, refers to this passage as "the biggest project of midlife.” He sees it as a state of "leaving behind what’s comfortable but confining" and discerning one's own desires from ingrained parental or cultural expectations. As a psychotherapist with a deep interest in supporting clients through major life transitions, I frequently see clients transition toward methodically curating greater intentionality in their lives. This transformation requires the courage to identify and then to act on what is true for oneself, even when it means stepping into less familiar choices and consequences.
I believe that in order to live with such intentionality we must first find and embrace a deep sense of personal authority. Carl Jung wrote about the idea of individuation as a lifelong project of separating from the expectations, demands, and needs of one’s parents or community to become more individually congruent. Hollis calls this a process of aligning the ego with "the will of the soul.” Others who write from a Existentialist-focused perspective, like Viktor Frankel, speak about finding the meaning in one’s suffering. As I stated in my previous blog post, although always somewhat painful — and sometimes excruciatingly so — not all suffering is ultimately bad for us as we are able to overcome and grow when we find the meaning within our suffering.
This moment is enriched through a narrative process whereby clients make a conscious efforts to reclaim and rewrite their personal story. This effort is borne by the realization that we are more than the product of what is done to us or how we have been seen by others. Clients tell me they benefit from journaling, dreamwork, and active imagination to strengthen dialogue with their unconscious depths and thus to enrich their realm of personal knowing.
Developmental psychology demonstrates how life brings forth a series of transitions and, whether we know it or not, we are always constantly moving through various transitional states. Some of these will stand out for us and in some we may benefit from help along the way. My hope for anyone continuously embracing their journey is to experience that combination of deep introspection and experience from which wisdom will bring forth a wellspring of courage and an openness. From this inner wisdom we may discover the strength to transform our consciousness to become better versions of ourselves.